kita di sini, mereka di sana...samakah?

Assalamualaikum...selamat datang  ke tahun hijrah yang baru..moga2 harapnya, segala amalan kita yang telah lalu diterima oleh Allah dan diampunkan segala dosa... pastinya, masing2 mempunyai azam baru, atau mungkin, azam yang sama, tetapi diperbaharui..

kita di sini, dikejutkan dengan berita yang menyedihkan ttg sahabat2, saudara seagama kita di Palestin. kalau belum baca, sila lah baca... peringatan2 sebegini banyak memperingatkan kita bahawa sangat jauh ujian yang Allah timpakan kepada mereka dan apa yang kita sedang alami. Mereka sedang berjihad, dengan jihad qital...tetapi jangan lupa, kita masih punya ruang untuk melakukan jihad, JIHAD NAFSU. 

Sempena tahun baru Hijrah dan tahun Masihi, rasanya sangat simbolik, untuk mereflek diri cermin diri, lihat diri mengikut mata hati, apa yang aku lakukan untuk ummah, adakah saya lebih banyak memberi dari menerima, adakah hubungan saya dengan Allah, sesama manusia dan alam saya jaga? apakah yang saya akan bawa bersama sebagai teman perjalanan di alam sana nanti, sudah lupa bahwa saya disini, hanya bersinggah untuk mencari bekalan... ?

digital books...

Assalamualaikum...gud morning everybody B)

rise and shine... i cannot sleep until now (the clock is now 4.37am...whyy) since last night... hari nie.. tak dapat rasa satu nikmat yang jarang ana hargai..TIDUR

its my fault though that i cannot sleep... i saw a packet of Pearl Cofee in the cupboard, although i cannot drink caffeine, but....*sigh*...just cant help it...

so... to make up for it [kononnya pujuk diri yang tak boleh tidur], i surf the net n found these cool links and a few books yang buat ana laaagi tak le tdo ..hoho,
just nak share a few link for e-books, ana pasti ...well, maybe ramai dah ada the real-book, tapi ana suka kumpul e-books cz senang nak cari contents dia... just ctrl+f.. =) rajin betul...

http://www.oasetarbiyah.com/?page_id=24

http://pustaka-hanan.blogspot.com/

http://perpustakaanmuslim.freehostia.com/

http://pustaka-ebook.com/

happy reading...

Aku yang semakin tua..a birthday entry..

Assalamualaikum...=)

apa khabar semua.. harap semua2 sihat belaka...jasad dan hati..insyaAllah...well.. i guess im not 21 anymore...
last Friday 19th December..was my 22nd birthday... kami sekeluarga celebrate simple2 je... [malu kalau celebrate besar2an...]


through out the day, i kept thinking... kejap je dah 22 ek.. rasa cam baru je masuk 20..(tanak percaya yang ana da tua..huhu)..bukan apa..terfikir...we celebrate the year that we have been living.. tapi if we know the years that we are left to live.. would we celebrate it the same way?... rasa terngiang2 je mama pernah cakap suatu masa dulu...akan tiba suatu masa, bila rumah cakap selamat tinggal, dan kubur panggil selamat datang...

waktu tu ..hanya amalan yang menjadi teman dan ruang... kalau baik amalan kita.. cantik lah teman kita dalam kubur..kubur kita luas dan cantik ibarat taman2 syurga..jika amalan kita tidak seberapa..na'uzubillahi min zaalik..ya Allah, minta jauhkanlah...


(tazkirah untuk DIRI SENDIRI especially...)..walaubagaimana pun.. alhamdulillah, Allah still gives me the chance to live, perbaiki diri... doakan kita semua dapat gunakan peluang hidup ni dengan sebaiknye...amiiin

bawah nie gambar my birthday cupcake...hidang dengan cornflake cookies, yang salut dgn gula, madu dgn butter...bithday girl buat sendiri sebab teringin nak makan...;P
mama ckp...dah abis raya baru nak buat kuih raya...hihi.. bukan apa.. klau buat untuk raya, gerenti tak dapat hidang untuk org punye.. mesti yang tukang buat kuih n konco2 yang habis kan...=)

thank you mama buatkan kek yang comel nie...jazaka ayah for the 'makan luar' special to celebrate and jazakillah hu khairan tu all, my family..atuk nenek yang jauh..my sepupu's yang nun jauh di mata.. sahabat2 yang sempat me'wish'kan my birthday and mendoakan hanah dunia akhirat..thank u very much for ur thoughts...yang belated pun tq juga...

tak lupa pada sahabat2 yang sanggup luangkan their saturday with me at jusco tmn u (jangan gelak kay...i know..dekat sangat) to get together ramai2...for ME...love u guys...=)o0ps... love u gurls...haha

i guess next time jumpe u all ana, and kite semua dah abis degree kut..harap2 nye begitu lah yea... untuk budak2 uiA...happy back to school.. blajar rajin2... niat kerana Allah... make every second of ur life as an ibadah lillahi...

p/s: walaupun ana dah 22.. tapi tak lama lagi nanti antunna nak naik 23 pulak kan kan kan??
;P

to kak aifa sayang... :')

Bismillahirrahmanirrahim....
with tears in my eyes, akhirnya.. i had to admit yang my beloved sister, kak aifa is really going.. and she is not here in JB kat umah pck ainol anymore...
actually, masa akak msg hanah ttg akak dh nak pg and mungkin tak jumpa tue.. i felt macam tak percaya je.. half of me was expecting that it was a joke, even though i know that akak wont really make jokes out of this.. so i tend to ignore the 'meaning' of the messege, and acted to be happy for what you have chose...(trying to convince myself that i am 'really' happy and tenang that ur r 'really' going)..sbb tu tak reply msg akak..sorry yea..

soon after, i read the emails (baru dapat buka email after balik kg for 2 weeks) from ma, yanti.. and all the akhwats, mata dah berair dah.. tapi bila baca mail from akak.. terus..waaaa...hahaha... very childish, i had to admit it... but truely.. akak, dijah and kak lah are those people yang banyak sangat membantu, memberi bimbingan dan dorongan since i was in tahun satu in UTM... teringat masa kita jadi MT sama2 hari tu.. we are the MT, we are the 'kuli', tapi pengalaman2 tu mmg sangat2 membina, sangat manis, walau pun pahit pada awalnya...

mmg suka tyme reramai duduk kat bilik akak.. mmg rasa akak penglipur lara pun... hanah duduk je bersandar kat dinding or any corner in the room, jadi pemerhati pon dah cukup, and it is soo fun just listening to the akhwats chot-chet chot chet, eventhough kalau kat luar, masing2 semua, skema nak %&#$@...=)

teringat juga tyme kat PJ, akak n kak fida suap hanah for buka puasa.. for some reasons, hanah tak makan dengan tangan sendiri pon tyme tu.. hihi.. rasa manja sangat.. (walaupun aku ni anak sulung...kui kui) ... tyme tu rasa bestnye ada org suap kan.. cakap je nak air.. akan ada org hulurkan air bungkus, air mata kucing kot, and hala straw kat hanah ..tinggal nak hirup je..uisy..manja btul...

banyak lagi nak tulis... tapi rasanya cukup lah setakat ini.. really, walaupun i cried..but i am very sure, segala keputusan yang akak buat adalah yang terbaik.. i know it is not easy for u to make the decision, as it is also hard for us accept it...

harap akak halalkan all the ilmu's yang akak ajar, recipe2 yang akak kongsi, minta maaf atas segala kesilapan atau kegarangan yang hanah tak maksudkan pun (hanah tak marah laa..akak is a fast learner...BEEETOOL ) sepanjang akak jadi akak murid hanah..hihi.. walaupon .. rasa cam hanah tak ajar akak banyak mana pun.. basic je...huhu..dah tu je yang hanah tahu... pape pun.. bile akak tgh ber-*****2 tu... ajar jga kat org lain..mga2 hanah dapat manfaat ilmu yang bermanfaat di alam 'sana' nnti..

walau bagaimanapun, what ever you do...tekadkan niat, teguhkan semangat, curahkan segala usaha n bertawakkalah kepada yang Maha Kuat n Maha Mulia, mintalah perlindungan dariNya, Pelindung orang2 yang beriman...

Matlamat hanya Pokok, Usaha hanyalah cabang...
our target is ONE, the same, with NO difference,
but there are many ways to it, akak cara lain, kami di UTM cara yang lain...
may out hearts be held together atas dasar ikatan cinta, kerana Cintakan Allah n Islam..(^_^)..

p/s: dah senyum dah...penuh semangat!

I'm Freeee...NOt

Assalamualaikum.. alhamdulillah.. ana berjaya melepasi minggu final dgn... tabahnye..
dalam kesibukkan final week of study.. nak abiskan cover subject semua.. ttibe lect kasi project pulak...bukan sorg..tapi dua org lect kasi project untuk dsubmit..huhu... penatnye masyaAllah...

agaknya nie persediaan untuk masa2 mendatang agaknye.. cz boleh dikatakan dalam minggu study week and final exam tu... jadual mmg penuh.. sampai tidur tu dalam keadaan...tak nyenyak cz tahu ada banyak lagi nak siapkan untuk project yang semakin dekat due date nye.. and pada masa yang sama... nak refresh balik untuk paper2 yang mendatang..huhu..tapi many people said zaman degree best..sooo...ni dalam proses untuk appreciate la nie..hihi

anyway..ana plan dalam cuti ni..nak siapkan my project..my final year project... entitled DESIGN AND ANALYSIS OF METACARPOPHALANGEAL (MCP) IMPLANT TO RELIEVE PAIN DUE TO OSTEOARTHRITIS... beeest sangat..orang jawa kata..i am very passionate about my project. Alhamdulillah..ditakdirkan untuk buat project yang ana betul2 minat.

dalam project ni.. i have to design an implant (objects that u 'plant' or place into the human body to replace the original part due to malfunction or disease) for the MCP joint (joint yang ketiga pada jari, kira dari kuku..1..2..3..hah..yang tue la)..my design is focused on silicone implant. sebabnye pilih tajuk nie...hmm...biarlah rahsia... ahaks...
cume bila kita kaji balik kejadian kita ni...rasa cam, susahnye nak gantikan apa yang Allah dah jadikan tu dengan sesuatu yang lain.. untuk function yang sama...

every part of the human body has its own function and the mechanical design of it is very specific for its own special reasons...

take our bone for example... kalau kita amek our femur, hip bone.. the compact lines shown in the pic (Taken from www.itmonline.org ) is to support the weight of the body... every single line structure has its own function..lagi compact kawasan tue..lagi banyak body weight yang tulang tu support...

the lines also show how tulang kita support our body...lines of compression along the pathways in which force is transmitted, the structure that makes it able to sustain such forces in many ranges, and many body positions..

Yes.. i know ramai yang kagum dengan Asimo yang comel.. tapi perasan tak...dia tak boleh nak stand up with both of its leg straight...sebab kalau dia straightkan kaki..surely it will tumbang... well, how can human stand straight? hmm...think..

Subhanallah..we learn engineering yang human selalu invent.. tapi the ideas usually comes from the engineering of the Almighty.. teringat ayat2...Maha Suci Engkau, tidaklah Engkau ciptakan ini dengan sia-sia...

anyway.. i hope semua yang tgh cuti2 ni (yang dah keje... cari2 la waktu cuti yea...hiihihi) gunakan masa sebaiknye...especially yang sedang menaip ni...every second of our lives will be recalculated...what we have done and what not... lagi2 masa tgh muda mudi lagi...ok laa...

nak get ready untuk pg rumah neibah esok... yang peliknye, nape laa semua reunion kene wat time besde dia..yang geram lagi..nape laa tyme besde dia sume dah balik cuti..semua universities tgh free pulak tue...hmm...ttibe tak puas hati...=)

hari baru...senyuman baru....=)

hihi... in the midst of exam fever nie.. nak juga masuk kat cni..bukan apa.. just nak bitau yang i dah buka braces...
seriously, ana 1st tym tgk mcam...haaa..ni ana ke..huhu.. tapi lama2 boleh kut terima diri sendiri yang dah laen sikit kalau snyum.. nak tgk gambar???
hmm.. tak sempat nak upload sekarang.. tgh wat report u project nie.. bile2.. sape2 yang free datang la wat appointment..hahaha..
ttibe rasa cam mesti ramai nak jumpe ana..uisy..perasan betul..

anyway...
rasa cam rindu je kat braces tu..huhu..
it teaches me a lot actually..
ana yang makan slow ni.. lagi lambat sebab si braces..
mmg kene amalkan yang nabi ajar kunyah 40 kali baru telan..
kalau nak suap makanan..kene siket2 je..
nak makan banyak2 pun tak boleh sebab penat nak mengunyah bila pakai braces...alamatnye.. pipi ana dah hilang..(kalau xpercaya..compare la gambar masa kat sekolah atau baru masuk u haritu..bulat laa siket muka waktu dulu2)..
berat pun dah tururn..tu tak le nak wat apa laa...
sebab si braces juga memaksa ana untuk gosok gigi, n floss SETIAP KALI lepas makan..
elok juga...siwak boleh kuatkan ingatan..hmm..terbukti juga laa...hihi

si braces akan limitkan if ana cakap atau bebel banyak sangat.. kalau cakap banyak.. nanti bibir rasa mcm sengal2 je sebab ada friction dgn si braces..(to think again...ouch)..

disebabkan si braces juga..mama suro ana buka specticles, n pakai contact lense..katenye..banyak sangat nampak besi kat muka...hahaha

pape pun.. ana akan merindui si braces...
(ok..back to project)

bertuahnya ana..bertuahnya kami..

i met ustazah jamilah yesterday.. i asked her why she wants to see me. she says i want to how my anak2 went through after they left me..
i was like.. how lucky i am to a hidayah-ian..ustazah actually has left the school due to some reasons, i already left the school because.. i finished my studies, but she came.. she asked me about my studies..my tarbiyyah, my usrah.. programs that i went through..n what i needed more for life.. oh my God.. to think ..she is my ustazah in secondary school, but.. im just out words to say how grateful i am..

to adik2 and kakak hidayah.. please.. appreciate our 'mothers and fathers' in hidayah.. they think of us more than we think.. i just realize that..huhu

she gave me a few words, words that go straight to the heart..on how Allah chose not all people untuk diuji, how Allah teaches us through life.. how bertuah we are to be salah satu penggerak dakwah as said in surah as-saf... she says never fail to do the little small good things like..selawat, solat sunnat, every praise that we said silently in our hearts, every single thing yang kite buat.. sangat besar pada pandanganNya.. you will get the benefit.. the calmness of it without you realizing it.. however, if you tinggalkan those things..little by little, akan rasa kehilangan yang teramat sangat..
she also said how sad she is seeing anak2 hidayah yang 'hilang'.. tak ada usrah.. maybe we didnt appriteate it.. bcz it came so easy to us.. tak payah cari.. mmg akan ada ustazah akan susun.. every week mmg akan ada..masuk u akan ada 'ramai' akak2 yang akan kejar.. akak2 dari usrah 'lain' pun ada (teringat time awal2 kmm n UTM dulu).. cz its the first step untuk futur dalam dakwah

those simple words..that i didn't really appreciate it at school.. but when i heard it yesterday.. i said to her..i really need that for now, and i did not realize it..

i hope i can carry on.. WE can carry on.. just do our best.. in every thing... after that, it all up to Him..

Pernah seorang syeikh tarbiyah memberi nasihat, ” كن قويا او لا تكون”….Jadilah orang yang kuat, andai tidak boleh maka tak payah jadi apa-apa.

may His blessings, taufiq and hidayah.. is always upon us..

The last week of the semester

What a week.. it was exhausted...
last weekend i went to kuantan to help with kak hashima's n dr rafiq's project. we stayed in grand continental for one night..it was actually a normal trip.. but it was an all gurls trip.. that was the best...(semua macam tak ingat je yang the next week tu msg2 ada banyak sgt bende kene buat)

hari isnin pulak.. it was my final year project 1 presentation, i was supposed to be the 8th presenter, kene bentang around 12.30 pm (tapi haritu rasa macam sgt2 gabra.. i came to the faculty at 8.30 am in the morning...),as i was going through my slides, around 9.30 am, suddenly my lecturer came to me telling that im second.. just around five minutes before the first presenter finished her's... i was like..whatta??huhu.. only Allah knows how i feel at that time (nak nangis pun ada)... tyme tu kononnye macam nak practice la (last practice before i present..tapi nama project pun tergagap2 nak cakap...) somehow Allah helped me along the way..i believe that everything happen for a reason and my presentation turned out well after all..Alhamdulillah...

on teusday..ada test biomedical signal processing..
the next day i was bz preparing for the next day,
on thursday.. we kene present our results on our medical electronics lab.. a system on how to ensure that the ultrasound used by physicians produces images that is really up to the standards of the American Association of Physicists in Medicine (AAPM)..even thought we didnt succeed to completely construct the system (system tu kene gune LabView untuk construct, baru belajar bende tu dalam seminggu n terus kene guna.. kalau budak science comp terer la kut).. the lecturer seemed to be very pleased..hehe..because we tried our best untuk siapkan.. even thought the best is not enough..huhu..pape pun.. dr yusuf (a medical dr) siap suruh completekan system tu cz dia nak gune kat clinic dia..haha...tengok la.. kalau ada masa...mgkn untuk project bile2..
jumaat pulak.. our klas kene bentang on how to plan and construct a hospital..it was quite fun...kalau nak tahu warna cat yang paling sesuai untuk bilik org gila..tanya i..=)..may be antum tau kut..

however..today.. Iqra' ada agm d dewan senat.. it was okay alhamdulillah..after zuhur.. akhwat 3 kereta konvoi beraya kat jamuan NGO Johor kat dewan taman U n rumah kak Rin..ngantuk tak terkira..dah la tak dapat tdo dalam kereta..(i was the driver..geramnye tengok yanti sleeping soundly at the back)..after maghrb je, terus tumbang...and slept like a log.. anyway...after this kene g umah kak aifa.. ada qiam and a few discussions with the akhwat's....i think tonight i need a good rest before tomorrow.. i had a trip to kluang.. beraya rumah kat rumah klas mate... konvoi reramai dalam 7 kereta and i lead.. siap la... i akan bawak perlahan2 je..hihi..

anyway.. it was a nice week to look back on.. somehow i manage to complete all the task that needed to be completed, spend time with my classmates..adik2.. my adik usrah.. akhwat2 yang kiut miut..sempat cit cat with are kat rusia n fatin kat klate, ex hidayah..djah, abyd, zie,atiq, sebah .. and my family.. i guess next week i kene pentingkan diri sket...
the final is just around the corner and nak ready untuk submit projects and assignments pulak.. i wish u guys sume gud luck in ur study kay..

satu lagi.. blog ni antunna bookmark je la yea.. tak payah my name letak kat ur blog laa (on the left side eh bukan, right side .. yang slalu people list out all their friends).. segan plak kalau org laen baca.. hihi (kalau camtu nape wat ek)..

(^_^) wassalamu 'alaikum

Rumitnya..

Rumitnya nak menjaga hati manusia...
lain yang dikatakan.. lain yang difikirkannya..
lain yang kita fikirkan..lain pula yang difahaminya (memangla.. di mana tahu apa yang kita fikir)
lain yang kita niatkan.. lain pula yang ditafsirkan..

tapi kenapa ya?
aku sering berusaha untuk menjaga hati makhluk lain yang bernama manusia.. sedangkan hati 'manusia-ini-sendiri' pun aku tak terjaga...
kadang2 come to a point yang..hmm biarlah apa yang mereka fikirkan..
Allah tahu niatku yang sebenar..
Allah tahu kekuatan dan kemampuan ku ..
Allah faham kesukaran dan ke'limitation'ku..

yes.. it all went back to him..
Penciptaku..who creates me..
yang tidak akan membebankanku melampaui kemampuanku...
yang memahami segala isi hati ...
menerimaku dengan segala kelemahan yang hanya Dia tahu...
yang melihat setiap butir amalan baik..
it all went back to.. tujuan sebenar hidup ku..

yeah..I know.. but sometimes I need to be remembered.. always

4th Year convoi Raya

Yesterday, we.. me n my coursemates went 'konvoi'ing together to few selected houses.
it was quite like a tradition to convoi ramai2 to rumah2 org jb (me, salleh, wani n nazrey).. and lecturers that allow us to come..haha..it started since in the first year..

the thing i like the most is.. there always someone who is responsible for the trip...someone who is going to make it happen.. this year's was really a memorable one.. 1st because this is our final year and next year.. sape laa yang akan tinggal lagi kat skudai ni (erm..me).. 2nd.. because Chan Teck Keng joined us.. at last..we had a chinese friend to go with us..and

3rd..something out of the ordinary happend.. ada accident (between two of the my classmates cz brek tk makan.. tym tu tgh hujan lebat sgt..) yes, it is very shocking, but pike2 balik macam terharu sgt cz after the accident.. everybody keluar from their kereta.. yang ada payung ke takde.. pakai high heel ke jubah ke=)..semua dah tak kesah dah..yang dah jauh kat depan patah balik tu help, sampai lencoi baju raya, kebaya, selendang masing2 ....

hmm, masa xcident to happen, mmg both cars tu in front of us..terus teringat pesanan my mum before i went, she said.. hanah baca doa eh before driving.. ayat kursi sekali.. promise me! alhamdulilllah both car can still move (we went to THREE more houses after that).. n takde fatal tapi it is a very good peringatan for me yang walau pun baca doa every time nk drive.. tpi i tend to take for granted kalau dapat sampai tempat tu dgn selamat n tak ada jam=)...

yeah..raya2 juga.. tapi malam tu me n my friends manage to finish our biomedical signal processing project ..yei(walaupon mula2 tu macam semua blank tak tahu nk gne matlab cz mood raya tak abish lagi.. hihi) ..
alhamdulillah..

Assalamualaikum...=)

Assalamualaikum semua... alhamdulillah, at last.. after a few long ..years maybe.. i finally started a blog of my own. its not that i dont like to write, but its how i finally manage to have the courage for me to let people to read what i wrote.. wierd?? i dont think so..

anyway... i think its because a 'few' of my friends and 'sepupu's kept persuading me to buat one..untuk korg update sume..and i think why not start now.. while you have the courage.. betta late that neva..

somehow i hope, it helps me to share things that i am unable to speak out, remind those who sometimes forgot, and menyahut seruan 'sampaikanlah daripadaku walau satu aayah'

to all my friends..and sepupu's...this is for u guys ^_-